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It’s NOT Baby Poop – alyssa calbert

I have never changed a baby’s diaper. I don’t really ever want to, but I want to be a mom. You see my dilemma. But that has nothing to do with this blog. The real point is, guacamole is not baby poop. I have never understood why people would compare it to baby poop. Well, unless they are only eating gross, browned guac In which case, I feel bad for those people. Don’t even get me started on guac that people buy in jars from the store aisle next to the tortilla chips. I ask, have you never lived?

I don’t mean to brag, but I make the best guacamole EVER. Just ask my high school yearbook advisor, T. Feil, who was once a guac-hater until he tasted the magic of which is Alyssa’s avocado delight at our annual green and red themed Christmas party. Yes, in this instance I’m like Jesus. I have healed the broken. You are welcome.

If I have not sold you yet, please, try it for yourself. Here is my world (and by world I mean my mom really likes it) famous guacamole recipe…


What You Need

  • 3 Avocados | More or less depending on how much guac fits in your mouth.
  • 1/4 bunch chopped Cilantro
  • Salt, Pepper, Garlic Powder | To taste, but I use a little less than teaspoon
  • 1 Tablespoon Minced Garlic | You could buy garlic and mince it yourself…
  • Palm full Red Onion | Green onions or shallots work, too!
  • 1/2 Jalapeno no seeds | If you like heat, add the seeds.
  • Squeeze of lime | You can use real limes or a bottle of lime juice.

Basically, you dump it all together and mash it up. Simple as that.

Please remember, I’m like Rachel Ray and don’t measure anything. The great thing about guacamole is that you can adjust the recipe to fit your taste. Like it salty, add salt. Feeling wild, add grilled corn. Make it, taste it, add what you are missing.

I don’t know how to successfully make it not brown in the fridge, but you won’t have to worry about that. You’ll want to eat it all.


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